Tagged: Jesse Eisenberg
Starfuckers: The Estate and Other News


The house closed today so we of course went over there at eleven o’clock…and the people that lived there before weren’t moved out all the way even though they were supposed to (nine o’clock was their deadline). We (my mum, Bart, James, and I) didn’t care, though. We went about our business as the mover people were moving shit out. We brushed a little of the paint samples on the walls; red in the kitchen, goldish and green-grayish in the living room, pukey-green and brown in James’s room, and a beautiful darkish gray in my room, as shown above. I am fucking getting gray in my room, bitches. My mum says that she’s going to paint the (horrible) trim white all over the house so we can do it in my room, too. So yay. I’m also going to get some shelving around the window and in the closet and I’m going to get a metal square thing and put it on the wall so I can have magnets and such. I’m pretty fucking excited for that. I’m also going to have a “creeper wall”, as I have donned it, with a whole bunch of shit I love. It might just be taped on my desk, but I’m not sure. So yeah.
We spent the whole day there–or they did, at least my mum and Bart. I had to leave at around three to go to work. They stayed there, though, until at least eight. Our neighbors (Michelle, Aaron, and Sauce) went over and painted some, and Bart got almost all of the tile up in the kitchen. I figure we’ll work over there whenever each of us isn’t working or going to class, which will be a lot. Oh, and we bought the previous owners’ outside table and chairs (lawn furniture or whatever it’s called) which is nifty because it was only a hundred dollars and something similar to it was like four hundred.
I’m fucking crazy with finals and everything. I actually should be in bed right now so I can get up tomorrow morning to do shit, but this was important.
Work was good. I got invited to one of my friend’s housewarming parties in July. I listened to Passion Pit’s new single and I love it a lot. I’m excited for their new album this summer. I’ve been trying some new music because I feel like I need it, so I’ve been like hoarding CDs from the library. The new shit I’m trying (no judging):
Helplessness Blues – Fleet Foxes (they came up on my Mumford iheartradio station)
If Not Now, When? – Incubus (because they’re touring with LP and I should give them a try)
Indian Summer – Carbon Leaf (I remember the name from something so whatever)
Love to Live – Living Sisters (was just in the folk section while I was skimming through)
Monuments and Melodies – Incubus (same as above)
Pioneer – The Maine (because Britta likes them)
Sacred Songs – Daryl Hall (okay, I like Hall & Oates, whatever)
Sainthood – Tegan & Sara (I heard about them somewhere)
Scratch My Back – Peter Gabriel (I like his In Your Eyes song and his cover of My Body is a Cage)
Twin Cinema – The New Pornographers (they’ve been staring at me for a while so I thought I’d try)
My iPod says I have 173 albums. That seems like a lot.
Anyway, I think that’s all that’s going on. My back hurts so fucking much and so do my legs and especially my right knee. I’ve been thinking about tattoos to get this summer (maybe “Mae”, because it’s my grandmother’s middle name? Or something like “Ma[kenzi]e” because that’s my middle name and hers all squished or whatever). I have a tumblr. It’s up on the menu as “mediocre.muon” because I’m still a little shy about it. I don’t let myself on it, though, since I have so much shit to do. Like a substantial amount of shit that needs to be done. I’m in denial about House. I don’t- no. I’m taking off Wednesday to do shit and I’m working Saturday instead of Sunday so I can go to graduation. It’ll be crazy this week.
Oh, and this.


-All
#nowplaying- Starfuckers by NIN.
#nowwatching- I don’t want to talk about it.
#nowreading- ugh.
#mood- fucking tired. Bedtime.
MARVELOUS MARCH 2012

-All
Quick Update + Jesse Gif

Work started Saturday morning, 8:30 to 12:30. I love working there. I worked Saturday, Sunday, yesterday, and I work tomorrow and Saturday morning again. I might have to work eight hour shifts on Wednesdays, 7:30 to 4. I’m not sure yet, though. It won’t happen for a while.
I got my new meds Friday and tried them. They’re basically Xanax in the sense that I take them as-needed, whenever my anxiety is bad. I took them Friday night and Saturday before work, and so far, I’ve noticed that they make me feel weak and shaky and emotional, like I could cry. Friday they helped my anxiety, but Saturday they didn’t as much, if at all. They look like forrealz drugs, though, like the shit you get off the street. It freaks me out.
If I’m not sleeping or at work, I’m doing homework. All the time. I just have so much shit to do, all the time. I hardly ever watch TV anymore, because I just can’t stand to sit and do nothing when I could be working on something. I have a paper due in English, American gov, and philosophy, all within the next four weeks.
I’m fucked for my meditation shit. I don’t like meditating, so far. I have no clue how I’m going to write a three to five page paper about how it changed my life.
I stumbled upon Jean-Paul Sartre’s Nausea, and it’s basically my life. I ordered it through the library, so hopefully I’ll be able to hold it in my hands in a month or so.
That’s all I have time for. So busy. So happy, too. I love college.
-All
#nowplaying- dance playlist. It keeps me going.
#nowwatching- Real Time, for breakfast and lunch, if I make myself take a break.
#nowreading- fucking everything, and when I get a chance, bits of Nausea by Jean-Paul Sartre.
#mood- good, a little stressed. Dancing.
An Update with a Pretty Gif
I had a pretty good weekend. We went up to Bart’s. On Saturday we went to a mall in Independence and a few hours after we left, there was a shooting there. I don’t know if anyone died but I know a few people got shot. On Friday, when we were on our way to dinner, we drove through a bad neighborhood and I saw a guy punch another guy and he fell to the ground clutching his stomach. Kansas City is the real deal.
On Thursday, I had my first appointment with my new therapist. She’s a student that specializes in CBT, which my old therapist and I thought would benefit me more. My old one specialized in identity and sexual orientation/identity stuff, but I’m over that (for the most part), so that’s why we changed. I think it’ll be fun, talking with her. Unfortunately, she’s only available on Thursdays, and I can only work at the library on Thursdays, so I’ll have to go right to the library after the appointment. We’ll see how it works.
Melanie was in Springfield on Thursday for a CPR training class, and after the appointment my mother and I met her at Olive Garden to eat. It was so great seeing her. She lived with us for almost five years, I think, and had more of an impact on me than she probably knows. We were talking, asking about Stephen (her son, two years younger than me), and she told us that he’s incredibly religious. He goes to the Baptist church that my step-great-aunt owns, the one I went to before and after school in fourth grade because my mum worked. It was also the one I went to Sunday school a few times, and it was the one where I got “saved”. He’s apparently hardcore about it. My mother mentioned that Baptists are rather strict about their feelings toward homosexuals, and Melanie was like, yeah, he believes it’s a sin. But it’s okay, she said, because it’s a sin, no more than being a murderer.
Stephen, the closest thing I have to a brother, the nicest, coolest kid I’ve ever known, the kid with a gay mom and a gay dad, thinks homosexuality is a sin. I was floored, unsurprisingly.
Tomorrow, classes start. I have a lecture from 5:30 to 8:15, American government. James has a math class around the same time, so I’m riding with her. I also plan to stay up until midnight tonight to see if my online classes show up on Blackboard. I am so fucking ready to get my ass kicked by school. I’m fucking ready to be a learned man.
I’m not that anxious about tomorrow. I mean, I am, obviously, but I’m handling it amazingly well. I just hope it sticks. So far, it has.
-All
#nowplaying- my studying playlist. I have a studying playlist now because I am in COLLEGE. I’m a COLLEGE STUDENT.
#nowwatching- I need to catch up on Family Guy episodes.
#nowreading- my textbooks, you know, BECAUSE I’M IN COLLEGE.
#mood- excited and hungry and tired and excited.
Zombieland Screenshots
Thirty-four images.

